Perfectionism and How to Overcome It

woman spreads her hands in front of laptop

If you struggle with perfectionism, you may also experience higher levels of stress, anxiety, and burnout. Maybe it feels like no matter what you do, it will never be enough.

Perfectionism is associated with having high expectations of yourself that you likely would not expect of anyone else. It is also a way of regulating uncomfortable emotions, such as a fear of failure or a sense of shame and loneliness that may be present when not living up to specific standards.

How Does Perfectionism Show Up? 

The overwhelming pressure to be perfect can show up in many different areas, such as in academics, relationships, professional settings, and your body image, to name a few.

If you suffer from perfectionism, you may procrastinate tending to important projects in fear you might fail at them. You may also feel nervous about being your true self around others in fear of not being perceived as perfect.

Below are some steps you can take to help you overcome perfectionism.

Cultivate Awareness 

You cannot overcome perfectionism if you are unaware of where it is showing up in your life and how it prevents you from living outside of its control. Ask yourself which areas of your life perfectionism is most present for you. In what forms does it take? How is it impacting your life on a daily basis?

Feel the Uncomfortable Feelings 

Perfectionism stays active when you avoid the underlying fear of not being perfect. When experiencing the thought of not being perfect, what specific fears come up for you?

Maybe it is the fear of judgment, rejection, loss, or failure that drives your perfectionism. It may also be a fear of not being accepted, loved, or appreciated for who you are.

Also, ask yourself where you feel this fear in your body? Maybe it is in your chest, throat, stomach, or head. Keep in mind there is not a right or a wrong answer, but naming where feelings are present in your body gives you access to move through them rather than resist them.

Do the Opposite 

When the urge to abide by the rules of perfectionism surfaces, can you allow that urge to be there but not take action on it? You can only overcome perfectionism by accepting the feelings at the root of it. When experiencing the discomfort associated with these feelings and not acting on them as you have done in the past, tell yourself that it is OK and that you are not doing something wrong.

Perfectionism can get in the way of reaching your goals in recovery, feeling confident, and being your true self. At Avalon Malibu, we recognize how intimidating changing the patterns in your life and relationships can be and are here to support you each step of the way. Whether through helping you cultivate self-awareness, befriend your emotions, or learn new coping mechanisms, we can support you on your journey to a healthier life. To learn more, call us today at (844) 857-5992.

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